This one is probably the closest I will get to a political post. I want to talk education and entitlement. Giving you some background on me first. I am the product of sixteen years of Catholic/ Jesuit private schooling, and I am in no way advocating one religion over another, and I think there are equal opportunities in the Public School sytem....sometimes. I have no clue the exact dollar amount of my education, but I imagine it is far more than I can possibly fathom spending in a year now! However, I have many friends (who remain nameless) who work in education, and I am rather disgusted at how our political system/ country has allowed our education to become nothing short of another entitlement program! Our health care system is bad enough, and I do not think we need another black hole for our government to throw money into. I will not get into the political jargon associated with this whole thing, but it is no secret the state of our economy as of today May 19th. Our unemployment rate remains staggering, new home sales are at an all time low, and we seem to be more worried about the guy/ gal who demands help from others. I understand that I am a very PRIVILEGED individual by having the OPPORTUNITY to have such a great education, and I have taken advantage of my PRIVILEGES as a young American to work hard and make a living. I am by no means a millionaire, but I live a healthy/ reasonable lifestyle.
Today, more Americans feel entitled to everything. No child left behind!?! Sounds great on the political stage front! Forget that!! Invest in the future of our country. Rather than going through the motions of education with blinders and earmuffs, only to have one more moron (yes I said it) entering our job market to contribute to what!?! Our political landscape only encourages this kind of crap. It sounds so great to have "no child left behind", but our country is now left in the dust. Our country is left behind when we put our CNN, Fox News, CNBC political tickers before the real needs of this nation. We have kids refusing to stand for the Pledge of Allegiance, Americans fighting for the rights of illegal immigrants, etc! I assure you..."no child left behind" is bullshit. When that kid that graduates just because he attended all of his classes, not paying a bit of attention, distracting the kids actually trying to obtain a proper education...we are losing! That child trying to pay attention is indeed left behind because the kid next to him is distracting him with why school sucks. Why worry about the kid going through the motions/ not standing for the Pledge...He won't contribute to the future success of our country. Because it looks so great to have a higher graduation rate when you are running for mayor, governor, senator, president!?!
I feel as a young American, a person who really cares about our Country, that we should worry less about entitlement programs. In a country where our middle class is constantly shrinking, and the upper/ lower class is growing...we are focussed on the wrong issues. We do not take care of our teachers (most of my friends have not received a raise in three years). What incentive is there for them to educate to their potential. Let's just get through the day! This is a band aid to fix the masses of Americans who have stood in line with their hands out for generations. I am sorry that so many children are the product of broken homes, impoverished lifestyles, violence, etc (I feel horrible about using 'etc' here as it certainly does not do any justice). Stop acting like we are doing the right thing....DO THE RIGHT THING! We can constantly take care of the people that are in economic or undereducated systems, or we can take the right steps to fix the generation "NOW" that is responsible for shaping our country's future. Obama preaches "CHANGE"...Ok...This is awesome. However, I was not one of the naive voters that actually thought our country could change in 4 years with one man. That would be like going from an infant to a grown adult in a 24 hour period. The necessary changes need to be made today to foster a "CHANGE" generation...maybe generations from now. I have a better idea....let's just keep electing based on our ignorance. Ignorance...after all...is bliss.
I will end this post with one question for you...When was the last time you looked on the bottom of a product and it said "MADE IN AMERICA?" We need to make more Americans before you start seeing the future of our Country shape back into the mold we all demand, but seemingly don't expect! Sorry if I pissed you off...I am already there
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Shit Happens
Well I could not come up with a better name for this post. Funny, the only reason I am writing this....a long time loyal customer (you know who you are) of Mango's actually mentioned she had read a few of my posts. My first follower!! So...if you are reading this, and you like it...lemme know. It really fuels my typing.
Let's get to the story. This happened last summer, and it was a hot hot summer evening. The temperature will only become more relevant as the story progresses. It was a Tuesday night, as I was behind the bar for one of my two shifts of the week. I was a little late getting behind the bar that night, as I was finishing up some journal entries in my office for quickbooks. I came up to find the main dining room slightly full, and the bar starting to fill with the regulars. As I became settled in for the beginning of my shift, I look into the dining room to see if there are any guests I would recognize. Mind you, Cafe Soleil is a fine dining, white tablecloth restaurant about a block from the White House. Tonight, however, we were not only sharing the block with the first lady and Barack Obama, who live in the most opulent of dwellings, but a gentleman that most definitely did not have a home at all. His back was turned to me, and I could only see the insane mess he had created at the table. The table cloth was dirtied, the flowers overturned, there was water on the floor, etc. I found the server, and I tried to get to the bottom of the situation. She was petrified, as she thought she was in big trouble. Apparently, I can be a tad bit intense from time to time!! HA. Anyways, I asked what he had ordered..."WATER....." She said trailing off. Let me stop for just a second here. I am more than sensitive to the homeless, and I often take leftover food, coffee, spare change, etc to the local needy here in the Golden Triangle. However, we usually try to avoid any conflict in the restaurant with them. I will even allow them to use our bathroom upstairs if they need to go.
Back to the story...this guy was clearly not lucid. I could see him talking to himself...pointing in the air. I think he was accusing the table next to his of being racist. Ironically, he was white....and so were they. He eventually caught my eye in the mirror along side the bar, and he then knew his gig was up. He stood up and walked right past his server. You would have thought he had a knife, a gun, and herpes because she quickly ran and hid behind another table. She was such a nice person, but very very very timid. I lost sight of him around the corner as he made his way toward the door. The only blind spot in the entire restaurant. I did not see what happened next, but there were several eye witnesses to the incident. A woman screamed loudly "OH MY GOD!!" Another woman looks up, and notices the man struggling with something. She thought he had dropped something from his pocket. Indeed, he had dropped something. However, only when she went to pick up his item, did she realize it was not a personal item....but he had deposited something on my carpet that was unholier than Satan's undies. It was poo, shit, caca, splaterama, etc. Whatever you want to call it, and I think I muttered all of the above when I finally ran around the corner. I had to calm the woman down, as I did not want to make a scene. I ran out in the street looking for the culprit. He disappeared as quickly as he deposited his brown gold on my new carpet. I went back inside...the woman still hovering around in disbelief. I acted quickly. I called over another server, who had not seen any of this. I grabbed one end of the carpet and rolled it up...almost to the point of the excrement. I told the server to pick the other end up...he looked at me bewildered. I said pick it up, and I motioned and lifted my side. He says "Why!?" I looked at him...then looked down. He saw it...turned his head, and said "C'mon man!" I started laughing. We waddled the rug around the corner to the ally where we dropped the shit rug down. At this point I was rolling in utter disbelief. I was disgusted, but it was sooooo outrageous that I was dying laughing at the situation.
The worst part was cleaning it. I sat there for about minutes thinking to my self "HOW AM I GONNA GET THIS CLEAN!?" Most would throw the rug away, but I was fully intent on keeping this oriental gem. The server now looked at me, and asked how I was going to clean it. I just looked up "Do you have a dog?" He said "No...."
Well......I do have a dog....so I attacked this little human patty with the same weaponry I would for the canine counterpart! A spatula (I threw it away afterwards) and a lot of water and chemicals that would surely kill any micro-fecal organism. I hosed it down completely, and we left it hanging over the fence over night!
This lovely rug still has a home in the entrance way at Soleil. So every time a customer walks in through our doors....there is a little bit of history beneath their feet. Or on their shoes? Kidding...It should be in a museum.
Keep ya posted for more to come...hope there are actually people reading this. Ha, A
Let's get to the story. This happened last summer, and it was a hot hot summer evening. The temperature will only become more relevant as the story progresses. It was a Tuesday night, as I was behind the bar for one of my two shifts of the week. I was a little late getting behind the bar that night, as I was finishing up some journal entries in my office for quickbooks. I came up to find the main dining room slightly full, and the bar starting to fill with the regulars. As I became settled in for the beginning of my shift, I look into the dining room to see if there are any guests I would recognize. Mind you, Cafe Soleil is a fine dining, white tablecloth restaurant about a block from the White House. Tonight, however, we were not only sharing the block with the first lady and Barack Obama, who live in the most opulent of dwellings, but a gentleman that most definitely did not have a home at all. His back was turned to me, and I could only see the insane mess he had created at the table. The table cloth was dirtied, the flowers overturned, there was water on the floor, etc. I found the server, and I tried to get to the bottom of the situation. She was petrified, as she thought she was in big trouble. Apparently, I can be a tad bit intense from time to time!! HA. Anyways, I asked what he had ordered..."WATER....." She said trailing off. Let me stop for just a second here. I am more than sensitive to the homeless, and I often take leftover food, coffee, spare change, etc to the local needy here in the Golden Triangle. However, we usually try to avoid any conflict in the restaurant with them. I will even allow them to use our bathroom upstairs if they need to go.
Back to the story...this guy was clearly not lucid. I could see him talking to himself...pointing in the air. I think he was accusing the table next to his of being racist. Ironically, he was white....and so were they. He eventually caught my eye in the mirror along side the bar, and he then knew his gig was up. He stood up and walked right past his server. You would have thought he had a knife, a gun, and herpes because she quickly ran and hid behind another table. She was such a nice person, but very very very timid. I lost sight of him around the corner as he made his way toward the door. The only blind spot in the entire restaurant. I did not see what happened next, but there were several eye witnesses to the incident. A woman screamed loudly "OH MY GOD!!" Another woman looks up, and notices the man struggling with something. She thought he had dropped something from his pocket. Indeed, he had dropped something. However, only when she went to pick up his item, did she realize it was not a personal item....but he had deposited something on my carpet that was unholier than Satan's undies. It was poo, shit, caca, splaterama, etc. Whatever you want to call it, and I think I muttered all of the above when I finally ran around the corner. I had to calm the woman down, as I did not want to make a scene. I ran out in the street looking for the culprit. He disappeared as quickly as he deposited his brown gold on my new carpet. I went back inside...the woman still hovering around in disbelief. I acted quickly. I called over another server, who had not seen any of this. I grabbed one end of the carpet and rolled it up...almost to the point of the excrement. I told the server to pick the other end up...he looked at me bewildered. I said pick it up, and I motioned and lifted my side. He says "Why!?" I looked at him...then looked down. He saw it...turned his head, and said "C'mon man!" I started laughing. We waddled the rug around the corner to the ally where we dropped the shit rug down. At this point I was rolling in utter disbelief. I was disgusted, but it was sooooo outrageous that I was dying laughing at the situation.
The worst part was cleaning it. I sat there for about minutes thinking to my self "HOW AM I GONNA GET THIS CLEAN!?" Most would throw the rug away, but I was fully intent on keeping this oriental gem. The server now looked at me, and asked how I was going to clean it. I just looked up "Do you have a dog?" He said "No...."
Well......I do have a dog....so I attacked this little human patty with the same weaponry I would for the canine counterpart! A spatula (I threw it away afterwards) and a lot of water and chemicals that would surely kill any micro-fecal organism. I hosed it down completely, and we left it hanging over the fence over night!
This lovely rug still has a home in the entrance way at Soleil. So every time a customer walks in through our doors....there is a little bit of history beneath their feet. Or on their shoes? Kidding...It should be in a museum.
Keep ya posted for more to come...hope there are actually people reading this. Ha, A
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Let's talk
I certainly won't bore you with delving into the monotonous life of Al with every detail, life issue, etc. I have always been bored listening to people carry on and on about how difficult it is. It seems that people love to hear themselves bitch. We like to call it "bitchin to complain" in the business. Some people are just so miserable, that they have to bitch just for the sake of complaining. My soup is not quite hot enough, there isn't enough alcohol in my drink, his steak is not the same size as mine, yada yada yada. Usually....the soup is plenty hot, the booze is the right amount, and you dumbass...we weigh every freakin steak! Usually, when I find someone like this, I will microwave the soup until it is boiling, pour enough alcohol into the drink to light it on fire, or I will serve them a porterhouse the size of Iowa! Kidding....Truthfully, I dont't really care about the people that are difficult. You just can't help them all!!
I have a few simple mantras I live by, that keep me out of trouble. 1. Go with what you know! If you don't make any decisions based on theory or heresay....you pretty much will never screw up. It's kind of like the speed limit thing. I know the speed limit is 55 mph, and if I drive the speed limit I will never get pulled over for speeding. Maybe not a great example because I speed all the time, but when I am working in the restaurant...it is my golden rule. I know if I serve good food, with great service, and have a pretty good concept....I know I will keep chugging along. I am not saying I do not take risks (I have taken some pretty big ones in my life), but as long as you have good facts behind the risk...you will be ok. I always tend to step on the gas when everyone else slams on the brakes! When the economy is down, most people freak out like a huge snow storm is on the way! By every last piece of toilet paper, get fifteen gallons of milk, we need thirty shovels! Christ...does that not piss anyone else off? You might be snowed in for 1 or 2 days. I know I love a good milk binge every once in a while!! Sorry for another digression...I do it a lot. If the rest of the world is driving so slow and worrying about hitting a car next to them, or changing lanes to be safer, so on....I tend to floor it and get in the fast lane. I cannot worry about the guy next to me, who is worrying about the guy next to him, who is worrying about the guy next to him...so on. Worrying is like a rocking chair....it is something to do, but it will not getcha anywhere. Plus, I would rather do the hitting, then get hit by someone else. That's all for today....who cares, no one is listening yet anyways. On the blog I mean...no one following. But I am totally cool with that!
I have a few simple mantras I live by, that keep me out of trouble. 1. Go with what you know! If you don't make any decisions based on theory or heresay....you pretty much will never screw up. It's kind of like the speed limit thing. I know the speed limit is 55 mph, and if I drive the speed limit I will never get pulled over for speeding. Maybe not a great example because I speed all the time, but when I am working in the restaurant...it is my golden rule. I know if I serve good food, with great service, and have a pretty good concept....I know I will keep chugging along. I am not saying I do not take risks (I have taken some pretty big ones in my life), but as long as you have good facts behind the risk...you will be ok. I always tend to step on the gas when everyone else slams on the brakes! When the economy is down, most people freak out like a huge snow storm is on the way! By every last piece of toilet paper, get fifteen gallons of milk, we need thirty shovels! Christ...does that not piss anyone else off? You might be snowed in for 1 or 2 days. I know I love a good milk binge every once in a while!! Sorry for another digression...I do it a lot. If the rest of the world is driving so slow and worrying about hitting a car next to them, or changing lanes to be safer, so on....I tend to floor it and get in the fast lane. I cannot worry about the guy next to me, who is worrying about the guy next to him, who is worrying about the guy next to him...so on. Worrying is like a rocking chair....it is something to do, but it will not getcha anywhere. Plus, I would rather do the hitting, then get hit by someone else. That's all for today....who cares, no one is listening yet anyways. On the blog I mean...no one following. But I am totally cool with that!
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Funny Story
Before I get to into who I am, or beore I start sounding like a cocky over confident jerk....I have a funny little story from last evening. I do actually have a life besides talking to you guys. I went out to American Ice Co in the U Street Corridor of DC for some dinner. Sidenote...interesting concept, and a great time with the bartenders from the Madhatter.
I digress...the story. I left in a cab with my younger brother, Eric, and headed towards his house off Conn Ave. The cab ride was nothing short of hilarious. The cab driver was clad in a giant white turban, and a beard as white as snow, just trying to add an image. Certainly not stereotyping...The cab was oddly a Toyota Corolla. The cab driver seemed like a quiet nice older gentleman, no different than most other cab drivers in the District. He was tough to understand, but we were, of course, polite. He mentioned something about the weather, and seemed like he was attempting at a conversation. However, this was only a brief insight to the oddness of this man. We dropped Eric off, and the cab continued on up Conn Ave toward Cafe Soleil. Shameless sidenote....that place is awesome. I leaned forward on the plastic seat that squeaked like a triumphant fart. He didn't giggle...nor did I...but I really wanted to. It is something about the ethics of laughing at a fart...or a fake fart at that! It is only ok to laugh at a fart in certain circumstances...I wish there were more socially acceptable times to laugh at the possibility of a fart. More digression....Anyone who has ridden a cab in DC knows that often a cabbie will reset the meter after the first passenger departs, usually charging the additional $1.50 new fare charge. This cabbie did not. I was obviously happy. Not necessarily about saving a dollar and a half, but that it felt like a mini Seinfeld-eske victory for me. So, I said "Thank you for not resetting the meter." This is where the bi-polar nature of this seemingly turban-wearing-Santa look alike really blossomed to its full potential. His eyes pierced through me in the rear view mirror. He even adjusted it so he could nail me with the full coldness of his black stare. He looked like he was on massive amounts of cocaine, as his pupils were the size of softballs. I felt like a little kid in the back seat, bearing down for the rath of dad driving the car. Yelling, "You cannot afford an extra three dollars!?!" Taken slightly aback, I could not resist that his math was off, and chimed in "actually it's a buck fifty..." trailing off, sliding, squeaking back into my seat. This time the farty squeaky sound was not funny...even to me. He kept muttering loudly, half English...half whatever. We were drawing my destination, and quickly realized I wanted this to be a pretty public drop off, as his anger continued to mount...his eyeballs were at least the size of basketballs now. He pulled up in front of the Bottom Line, and with my ever awesome luck....there was no one out front. He slammed his fist on the meter, clearing the meter to $0.00. The cab was suddenly much darker, as the red glow from the meter now left our presence. I sat there with a fistfull of $5 in my hand. He would not turn around, and adjusted the mirror so he had a view of I street now. I was glad to have the eyes off me for a change, but now the awkwardness of the few seconds that felt like hours began to set in. Finally, I muttered, "and how much do I owe you?" I may have apologized too...but I do not remember exactly. He said, "You American too cheap, not save money,...sorry I picked up!" He was yelling so loud I was actually scared of a man who was no taller than Yoda. I placed the crisp bills on the center console and began to open the door. "No!" He crumpled them up into little balls and threw them at me one by one. I was dodging them like they were bullets! I brushed them off my lap and darted out the cab. He was still yelling....no more English at all. I was laughing now because it was so ridiculous to watch this man throw a temper tantrum over nothing. He unbuckled the seat belt, reached back, and threw them out in the middle of I street traffic. Floored the car in park...slammed it into drive, and tore tires down the street. I was having one of those "Holy crap did that really just happen!?!" moments. I looked around to see if anyone had seen Yoda's episode? Nope. I walked out into the street holding a hand out...stopping traffic, while bending over to pick up the bills. I chuckled "Free cab!" I saved his number in my phone. I plan on using him for all my trips in the city now.
I digress...the story. I left in a cab with my younger brother, Eric, and headed towards his house off Conn Ave. The cab ride was nothing short of hilarious. The cab driver was clad in a giant white turban, and a beard as white as snow, just trying to add an image. Certainly not stereotyping...The cab was oddly a Toyota Corolla. The cab driver seemed like a quiet nice older gentleman, no different than most other cab drivers in the District. He was tough to understand, but we were, of course, polite. He mentioned something about the weather, and seemed like he was attempting at a conversation. However, this was only a brief insight to the oddness of this man. We dropped Eric off, and the cab continued on up Conn Ave toward Cafe Soleil. Shameless sidenote....that place is awesome. I leaned forward on the plastic seat that squeaked like a triumphant fart. He didn't giggle...nor did I...but I really wanted to. It is something about the ethics of laughing at a fart...or a fake fart at that! It is only ok to laugh at a fart in certain circumstances...I wish there were more socially acceptable times to laugh at the possibility of a fart. More digression....Anyone who has ridden a cab in DC knows that often a cabbie will reset the meter after the first passenger departs, usually charging the additional $1.50 new fare charge. This cabbie did not. I was obviously happy. Not necessarily about saving a dollar and a half, but that it felt like a mini Seinfeld-eske victory for me. So, I said "Thank you for not resetting the meter." This is where the bi-polar nature of this seemingly turban-wearing-Santa look alike really blossomed to its full potential. His eyes pierced through me in the rear view mirror. He even adjusted it so he could nail me with the full coldness of his black stare. He looked like he was on massive amounts of cocaine, as his pupils were the size of softballs. I felt like a little kid in the back seat, bearing down for the rath of dad driving the car. Yelling, "You cannot afford an extra three dollars!?!" Taken slightly aback, I could not resist that his math was off, and chimed in "actually it's a buck fifty..." trailing off, sliding, squeaking back into my seat. This time the farty squeaky sound was not funny...even to me. He kept muttering loudly, half English...half whatever. We were drawing my destination, and quickly realized I wanted this to be a pretty public drop off, as his anger continued to mount...his eyeballs were at least the size of basketballs now. He pulled up in front of the Bottom Line, and with my ever awesome luck....there was no one out front. He slammed his fist on the meter, clearing the meter to $0.00. The cab was suddenly much darker, as the red glow from the meter now left our presence. I sat there with a fistfull of $5 in my hand. He would not turn around, and adjusted the mirror so he had a view of I street now. I was glad to have the eyes off me for a change, but now the awkwardness of the few seconds that felt like hours began to set in. Finally, I muttered, "and how much do I owe you?" I may have apologized too...but I do not remember exactly. He said, "You American too cheap, not save money,...sorry I picked up!" He was yelling so loud I was actually scared of a man who was no taller than Yoda. I placed the crisp bills on the center console and began to open the door. "No!" He crumpled them up into little balls and threw them at me one by one. I was dodging them like they were bullets! I brushed them off my lap and darted out the cab. He was still yelling....no more English at all. I was laughing now because it was so ridiculous to watch this man throw a temper tantrum over nothing. He unbuckled the seat belt, reached back, and threw them out in the middle of I street traffic. Floored the car in park...slammed it into drive, and tore tires down the street. I was having one of those "Holy crap did that really just happen!?!" moments. I looked around to see if anyone had seen Yoda's episode? Nope. I walked out into the street holding a hand out...stopping traffic, while bending over to pick up the bills. I chuckled "Free cab!" I saved his number in my phone. I plan on using him for all my trips in the city now.
Sunday, February 27, 2011
So....
Most people blog about nothing overly important, but somehow figure they will change the world with their liberal or overly conservative ways of thinking. Not talking politics....for sure. I know as much as most of the under knowledged youth that has shaped the world we live in today. I am not a hipster, not a liberal, not right winged, nothing special...just Al. I am definitely different, weird, odd, misunderstood....whatever you want to call it. But overall...I'm a happy man. Quirky....but happy. I am certainly good at pissing people off, but for some reason...they love me. Perhaps most of them don't have a choice because I am either family, a friend of a friend, coworker, boss, whatever. I sometimes wonder why my insanely beautiful girlfriend will even share the same oxygen in a room....much less a bedroom. I write this blog on an iPad wearing skinny jeans, drinking starbucks...but as registered republican. That should give you an idea of where I am in life...sometimes you don't have to fit in a like a round peg in a round hole everyday to make sense. I would rather ram the square peg into a tiny triangular hole just to be different, and odds are it would be faster for me to make Sense of things. I will get you from A to B faster than the idiot who will run your from C to Z. I hate questions, I have the answers....sometimes, but I wonder why people need to ask so many questions to arrive at the answer. I will undoubtedly piss some people off at some point in my travels of life. But this is my life...so if you don't like it...suck it, good evening! Go read your hipster blog or any other lifestyle diary that is as predictable as a drug addict. They always go back to what feels safe, even though it may not be right. Look forward to pissing you off later, Al
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